My Dear, Dedicated Readers,

I didn't think this sort of thing would happen so soon. Sure, my blog is captivating, rich, entertaining, and inspirational, but I had no idea you were so galvanized by such simple prose.

This post is directed at the most active amongst you (you know who you are). I have a simple message: violence is not the answer!

In an earlier post, I put a particular ad campaign on blast for it's egregious lack of grammatical integrity. Although I was certainly heated, dismayed, and upset, I by no means authorized or encouraged violent reaction.

Walking down Montgomery Street the other day, I was appalled to see that my words had been used to justify an act of violence (see photo)

I'd like to extend a heartfelt apology to this poor, defenseless poster - my heart and thoughts are with it and its entire family.

To the dear, misguided readers responsible, I ask that you pray for this poster and its speedy recovery.  I also ask that you take a look at your actions, and ask yourself if you really acted in the best interest of our cause.  Sure, this poster displayed a lack of compliance with well-defined tenets of grammatical integrity, but I remind you that ours is not the role of enforcer!  Violent action such as this does more to harm than help our cause.

It is only by exemplifying the statutes of grammar and cleverness that we so cherish that we shall prevail.  In the words of Edward Bulwer-Lytton, "the pen is mightier than the sword".

So, dear readers, please take these words to heart, and go forth with renewed commitment to properly placed apostrophes, appropriate metaphors, and habitual proof-reading.  Let's lead by example.

The Pannier Scare

I nearly lost my pannier (pan-yer) the other day. It was a scary moment -the realization, upon returning home, that my pretty yellow bag was not with me, and that it was lying all alone, exposed on the side of the road, with the pungent smell of leftover Thai food emanating from its unbuttoned maw.

I'd lost it in the shuffle of transferring myself from bicycle to automobile. First I had to remove the pannier from my bike, then extract the bike rack from the trunk and affix it to the back of the Honda. Then the phone rang, and the remaining maneuvers were conducted with my head cocked awkwardly to the left - set the bike on the rack, then frantically search for my car keys. For once, I hadn't neurotically double-checked my pants for my keys before closing the trunk. This left open the possibility that I had indeed locked the

keys in the trunk. All of this was relayed to my friend on the phone, until finally, upon the forth deep dig into my satchel, I triumphantly produced my keys. So excited was I by the reassurance that I'm not a complete space cadet, I completely neglected (as would a space cadet) to stow my pannier, and off I drove to the Sunset, leaving my poor bag to fend for itself. Miraculously, upon returning an hour later, the bag was still there, Thai food and all, and the rest of my night was so much better because of it.

The moral of the story: take your damn time.

If you'd like to speak to a friend on the phone, relax and enjoy the conversation until it's done.

I probably would've been there all of 3 minutes extra had I saved my luggage rearrangement for

after the call. Walking down to Java Beach this morning, I realized that I was hurrying - at 8:15 am on a holiday morning - to sit down and write this post. I slowed down to a stroll, and immediately felt my body relax and a little shudder of relaxation run up my spine. I thoroughly enjoyed the remainder of my walk, even stopping to snap a couple of photos.

You've heard this before, but life's too short to be in a hurry. You've also heard this before: enjoy the moment - every single one of 'em.