Poco Hecho Has Left the Building

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My First Painting of 2011

"Pots and Accord"

View from my bedroom window.

Bentley of The Bachelorette: Human Malice and the Shame of ABC

This week saw the departure of Bentley, a truly unique presence on The Bachelorette.  Openly disinterested in Ashley H, Bentley alternated degrading her privately to the cameras and endearing himself to her publicly with various insidious tricks. 

Bentley is a sociopath.  Showing complete disregard for the well-being of Ashley, he finally decided to leave after not receiving a rose on the group date. Unsure of how to tell Ashley, and not for a moment considering telling her the truth (that he’d rather “swim in pee than plan a wedding with her”) he pretends that the time away from his daughter is too much to handle, and that he simply cannot be without her any longer.

Before leaving, however, he tries to sabotage her chance at finding love with somebody who actually cares for her (e.g. one of the remaining Bachelors), by implying the possibility of a future relationship with Ashley.  Stroking her face, he says “after this is all over, I mean, who knows?  I want to leave a ‘dot dot dot’ on the end of this.  I know logically we shouldn’t leave a ‘dot dot dot’ but I’m not thinking logically”.

Essentially he leaves himself as firmly planted in her psyche as possible, at once breaking her heart and leaving matters completely unresolved.  How is Ashley to move forward now?  When you fall for someone, your mind, powered by your heart, will invent any number of scenarios for future possibilities with that person, and the way you approach other potential mates is fundamentally different.  Bentley knows this of course, and he knew that leaving Ashley without closure would be his final and greatest “achievement”.

It’s the most fucked up thing I’ve ever seen one person do to another person without physically hurting them.  I know this is a TV show, and I poke fun at the absurdity of it all, but this girl is really here hoping to find love.

It’s scary to see a relationship like this develop so quickly.  How a smart girl like Ashley, in two weeks, could be completely deceived and apparently powerless to stop herself from falling in love with somebody who does not care for her is mind-blowing.  She was warned by a former contestant that Bentley wasn’t here for her, and when confronted about it Bentley did nothing whatsoever to show his affection for her or assure her that he cared.  All he did was pick and choose the best moment to prey upon her mind and emotions, and methodically tie her to him as he no doubt has done many times before.

Where some men get this training I do not know, but it is as if they have been training—preparing and practicing their powers of illusion, refining their methods of brainwashing.  In Bentley we see a man who has perfected these “skills”, and is putting them to work on the grandest of stages.  He knows he’s good at what he does, he’s had a long history of psychologically dominating women, and he derives some sick satisfaction from displaying this facility.

Perhaps we should feel sorry for Bentley.  Perhaps we should recognize that he has nothing to be proud of but his ability to abuse women.  We can imagine the day that his daughter sees these tapes, or his future wife (if he ever finds one).  I hope he has come a long way by then, I hope it makes him sick to watch it, and I hope one day he apologizes to Ashley.

As for ABC, they should be ashamed of themselves.  For all “The Bachelor’s” talk of helping people find true love, for all their emphasis on “being there for the right reasons”, they sat back and watched as a psychopath maliciously assaulted the star of their show, rubbing their hands together in anticipation of a spike in ratings.

Rozlyn of The Bachelor

In Jake Pavelka’s season of The Bachelor, one of the Bachelorettes, Roslyn, was abruptly booted from the show after allegedly making out with one of the producers.  She was confronted immediately, righteously, and sent packing.  Jake wasn’t left to find out the hard way, he was informed after Roslyn had been extracted, and the show played up again the importance of “being there for the right reason”.  We were supposed to feel proud of Chris Harrison, indignant at Roslyn, and relieved that good-guy Jake had been saved from some two-timing slut.

Three seasons later, and here comes Bentley.  Him making it through the screening process indicates one of two things: either he did an excellent job faking the application, or ABC early on saw the possibility for a villain.  Let’s hope it was the former.

Apparently from day one, Bentley expressed openly (to the cameras) his disinterest in Ashley.  He clearly stated that she wasn’t “his type”, and that he intended to play the game to win a couple of roses, only to leave at some point down the road.

ABC did nothing.  They watched closely and silently as Bentley endeared himself to the Bachelorette, won a rose on the first group date, all the while ramping up his cynicism with private jabs at Ashley’s appearance, and lines like “she’s the type of girl I’d totally hook up with once in awhile”.  When he finally decided to leave, they allowed him to enter her house, touch her, hug her, kiss her, make her cry, lie down with her, touch her face, etc. for an extended period of time, then, when he finally left, followed Ashley into her room as she threw herself, sobbing, under the covers of her bed.

If Ashley had seen the tapes of his confessions to the camera she would have screamed bloody murder at his attempt to even approach her.  And rightfully so.  To allow this predatory beast free reign was highly unethical.  To do so purely to drive up ratings and increase profits is immoral.  Looking forward to next week!

The Bachelorette Season 7: Musings from Week Two

Despite the fact that I’m not crazy about Ashley H, I’m hooked on yet another season of The Bachelorette.  I missed the first week, but here are my thoughts on week two.

Ashley and William 1-on-1 in Las Vegas:

William looks like Prince William with a small crooked nose.  He and Ashley pretend to get married and then have a dinner in the Belagio fountains. William tells her about how his dad died and that he's kept his watch set to the time his dad died ever since.

Ashley: “I’m looking for somebody serious, and because your Dad died, that means you’re serious, and that makes you everything I’ve ever wanted.  Basically my requirements are that you are a guy and that you can have fun and that your dad died.”

Group Date:

Brooooos going to Vegas!  Whooo! A big group of guys goes to Vegas and has a dance-off to see which crew gets to stay and dance with Ashley.

At this point, they haven’t shown us many of Ashley’s awkward hand gestures yet.  Perhaps focus groups have revealed they really don’t like these gestures, and she's had some training.  In any case, the guys are all drooling over her because they’re dressing her well, obviously have had her working out really hard, and she's a terrific dancer. But just below the surface I can see the awkwardness.

Bros being made to dance!  No way!  Out of their comfort zone!  Nobody saw that coming.  Because The Bachelor has never had dates that involve impromptu performances in front of thousands of people in Las Vegas.

After the date, Wes pulls Ashley aside:

Another sob story?  I’m sorry, Wes.  Your wife died.  That’s terrible.  Don’t use it to get the girl.  It’s the first group date and you don’t know this person at all and now you have something to talk about that doesn’t really have anything to do with you or her or your compatibility. Doesn't anybody want to try having a real conversation?  Oh man it’s so true you really do have to cherish every moment now.  And the fact that he can open up and tell her that?  Oh my god that’s so amazing.  And the fact that she listened to him and was kind and understanding?  Oh my god that means she’s so amazing.  Because most people probably would just say shut the hell up don’t tell me about your dead wife.  Right?

Bentley and Ashley get some one-on-one time:

Bentley tells America that he's a huge dick and isn't at all interested in Ashely H. Bentley, you suck.  Your daughter probably sucks.  You’ve somehow gotten your hooks into Ashley, you bastard, and you’d better be found out or give up the game soon.  Was this part of your application process for the show?  “Hi, I’m an asshole and I’ll be the bad guy for the season”. Your name sucks too.  It’s not even a name, it’s a type of car.  Everybody knows this. Your parents knew this. It’s not some exotic ethnic name or something, your parents just named you after a really nice, expensive car, because it’s probably the most expensive car they could think of.

And yes, maybe Ashley isn’t that spectacular but you’re being a huge dick about it and I hope it somehow bites you in the ass.  Sadly, I have a feeling there are plenty of girls out there that secretly hope to meet you and hook up with you because they wanted to be treated like crap too by a tall puffy guy named after a car.

Ashley takes Mickey to Vegas:

Mickey opens up and tells Ashley that—Gasp!—his mom passed away about six years ago. Naturally, Ashley is smitten, because as we all know the number one thing she’s looking for in a man is a death in his family.  And then they walk down to the beach, and, wouldn’t you know it, some band we’ve never heard of starts playing!!  Could the night get any more perfect?

The Cocktail Party:

The highlight of the night was Jeff the mask stalking around the staircase like the Phantom of the Opera.  He finally accosts Ashley on the staircase, gives her a super awkward hug and continues to build up his mask as this incredibly symbolic thing that’s about more than just everything being on the inside.  Shocker: he had a near-death experience five years ago and since then everything’s been different.  He’s happier now than he ever has been, and he says this with about as much joy as 35 year-old guy in a mask that has absolutely no chance with the girl he’s talking to and is still bitter over his ex wife, who “he decided to move on” from, but who most likely left him because he’s a complete weirdo.

He finally comes around to taking off the mask, or at least setting the grand stage for his unveiling, and after staring at Ashley for a good five seconds in silence he slowly reaches both hands for his mask and - he’s interrupted!!  Some dude on the stairs cuts him off and he’s so wrapped up in himself and this incredibly symbolic moment that has now been ruined that he stands up in disgust and walks off, leaving the mask on.

How Ashley managed to find the strength to listen to the producers and keep the mask around for another week is beyond me, but she did and maybe, just maybe, we’ll see him unveiled next week.

Front runner: Mickey

Guaranteed to get sent home next week: Jeff the Mask